At first glance when Karen posted to me, I thought she was trying to tell me that she was pregnant.

Then I realized it was a little too far fetched

After proper analysis, I finally understood.

"AH Karen, next time when you buy Macdonald and is still hungry, please don't eat the brown paper bag that comes with it. It is meant to be a carrier, NOT a supplementary diet for your extra value meal. See la, eat liao puke all the shit."

P.S: Actually she is talking about my title. For her effort in drawing, I must blog it. ROFLMAO!

Labels: Wtf

Had never battled so many instances of flashfloods gushing out from the eyes of others. So many things just happened. Totally deranged.

But I was glad that I made certain choices in life. You know... like placed on a spiritual test to choose between compassion and production... between good friend and work. Gawd, it was kinda difficult because I had just finished a massive event and there are much backlog waiting for me to clear (on top of all the urgent stuff). And the thing is that my sort of shit is the kind of shit that if I don't clear them regularly, it just piles up - nobody could help me to clear them anyway.

When I received the emergency button, I just paused for a moment. Yes I actually paused.

Then I started reasoning with myself.

"FUCK! Not like SH is paying you millions of dollars! Not like that additional 5 hours of work will rake in million of lines for the company. That 5 hours probably won't even stir a shit... but it will make tremedous difference to someone else."

My choice becomes apparent.

Labels: General

Interesting to see how Progressed Sun triggers the entire T-square, involving 4th, 11th and 7th house (with Venus, Moon and Uranus).

8 years ago when progressed Moon triggered the exact T-square, by conjunction of progressed Moon with Uranus at hard aspect - it wasn't easy as well.

What a realization!

Labels: General

人一定会东山再起

Same goes for the blog.

New skin.

New life.

New beginning.

P.S: Business as usual from today onwards.

Labels: General

Originally posted by kristovorus:

i know that there no absolute in such matters.. but i would like to hear from a different perspective.

Say theres A , B and C

A loves you alot, but you dont really love A that much; more of a platonic love
You love B alot, but B doesnt really love you. but is still willing to accept you

And then theres C, which is an unknown but stands a small but significant chance of being the true soulmate you've been looking for


My question is.. which is better? To spend you life with someone who loves you , or with someone you love?
Or to take a bold step into the unknown?

on another related but distinct issue,


I may not have lived for long, but I'm already quite dis-illusioned by the concept of love. Quite frequently i've been hearing of marriage problems and stuff. It seems like " i love you " now has an expiry date attached to it. Recently my father got a mistress, and it seems like my parents are divorcing. Now i'm quite worried about myself because the guys in my family seems to have a propensity to being fickle ( my grandfather's another one )

I am admittedly quite fickle-minded, which is something i want to change. Its like.. i like a girl.. then i chase her. But somewhere just before she falls for me, i have a change of heart due to perhaps perceived flaws or circumstances. Then i'm stuck with a girl who likes me but i do not anymore. I feel like a bastard and nowofdays i dont bother to act on my feelings anymore, just bury them deep and wait for the likings/crushes to pass.

What should i do? :(


Let me point to you the discrepancy in your thoughts -

You claimed that your grandfather is promiscuous. Then you discovered that your dad is like that too. And now, you begin to believe that you are showing signs of it, in which you concluded that you are also fickle-minded and could potentially be a promiscuous person, just like your dad and grandfather.

So what you are suggesting is that being promiscuous is hereditary or there is probably some kind of 'promiscuous' genes in your family. This is totally spurious and irrational.

It's not the propensity of being fickle, but the insecurity that manifest and disguise itself behind the reason of fickle-mindedness.

Your behaviour is not uncommon - it is a defensive mechanism provided by your emotions to reduce your immediate risk by having to cut the amount of emotional investment you will actively seek to invest in somebody once you have unconsciously decided that you have done enough to secure her affection.

The change of heart is a methodology to protect yourself, caused by the subconscious insecurity that is insidiously present in your life. Witnessing failing relationship around you reinforced this insecurity - the more your reality corroborate with the findings you have inevitable concluded, the worst this insecurity will eat into you.

This will manifest into a real issue in the future, if you do not have the self awareness to perceive and effectively address this rot.

Having witnessed failing marriage, even between your parents, does not mean that yours is going to end up like that. This self fulfilling prophesy driven by fear and paranoia will eventually become your failure in relationship. It has nothing to do with the frailty nature of relationship, but rather, the biased conceptualization which you have inevitably cramp yourself into.

Surely, you can always try to escape before you can settle yourself and commit to a particular person, but you will never be able to grasp the lesson of commitment until you have manage your insecurity.

If you want to learn about love, be prepared to take some risk in getting hurt and shed some tears - it's part of the growing up process in love.

Cheers

Labels: Aunt Agony

Getting the flashbacks again.

I realized such phenomenon is the result of my thoughts having to exercise its freedom to break free from incarceration, which I have banish them all into my unconsciousness for eternity.

I call them emotional resistance - but the plea of these futile human emotions is totally wipeout by the onslaught of my growing vampiric nature.

I start suffering from periodic, selective amnesia. I start having this inability to recall certain things, especially those belonging to a certain past. I kinda discovered this it by chance - some things used to have great symbolic representation to me are now objects that is define namely by its function. When I tried to reposition myself in the perspective of what I used to live by, my mind, in fact, deny the attempt.

I had no recollection. Nothing whatsoever. And it's not just blog words - it's happening in my reality.

It actually took me some time to figure out that the emotional link is actually missing. Just some shade of blackness that construct little meaning.

Freud would term it as defensive mechanism.

Is this recovery?

***

I remember viewing a plateau of magnificent blooming flowers, of cyan, indigo and violent, cast over a stretch of land where love used to flourish. As far as my sight could carry itself across the horizon, this is where I knew as Love.

I remembered the gentle rain that nourished the fields of flowers, as it caressed my skin when the heavenly drops softly brushed past my hands; I tried to contain them among my lithe fingers as they fell upon Gaea's plain. It was playfully ecstatic as I shaped those magical moments with my awkward hands to fiddle with different texture of the tiny droplets.

I closed my eyes and felt beads of water drummed against my body, like hundreds of Pixes swarming around me. The coaxing rush of the pouring, ironically kept noise of the world away from the quiet heart of passion. As I gaze towards the ridge of mountains, I could see shimmering reflection of light emanated from its glacier-covered top, brillantly sending fascinating beam of dancing light back to where I stood.

I behold the beautiful scenary and was spellbound.

Yunhaier




好花不常开，好景不常在

Labels: Chronicles

One of my favourite quote coming from Kalama Sutra.

If concept cannot be tested, then perhaps it's merely a concept that can be dismissed readily. After all, how can I prove to you something that I cannot prove it to you? - Yet this logic bounded many people unconsciously.

Reality is the best arena to put concepts into test - surely life is not eternal, but even such short time frame is sufficient to validate certain understanding and the never-ending pursue of truth.

***

Rely not on the teacher/person, but on the teaching.

Rely not on the words of the teaching, but on the spirit of the words.

Rely not on theory, but on experience.

Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it.

Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations.

Do not believe anything because it is spoken and rumored by many.

Do not believe in anything because it is written in your religious books.

Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders.

But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and the benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it."

- the Buddha

Labels: General